Wednesday, April 30, 2008

being a mom

I've often wondered how life has become so complicated. Of course, there are the obvious reasons that separate the innocence and ease of childhood from the world of responsibility as a parent. But I frequently wonder why my life as a mother is so very different than my own mother's life seemed to be. Or my friend's mothers, as I remember them. It's not that I wasn't a keen observer of the adult's around me. I was always the last kid awake and sitting quietly amongst the adults, listening, watching, taking it all in. I remember hoping no one would notice me and send me to bed.
I wonder what has changed so much then. No one ever seemed as stressed with the day to day as I often do, or actually spoke about it (unless there was a recession or job loss). But there seems to be a constant state of rushing and stressing now, that I don't remember. Our houses seem bigger (more to clean), wants seem more extravagant (more to buy), and careers so competitive (more stress). I don't think I like it much. The rushing around, that is.
In the last few months, I've been very drawn to simplifying my life. Remembering the things that I loved as a little girl, and making them a part of my life again. With children, I am able to relive some of that childhood innocence. And I don't see why we, the adults, can't have more of that too. The foods I am making, the way I am decorating the house, what I am planting in the garden this year. All of it circles back to what I loved as a child.
I read the most amazing words about mothering here. And I keep rereading the last paragraph because it makes it so clear that being a mother is such an important role. It reminds me that nurturing my family, loving my husband, and creating a sanctuary for us all that is both peaceful and pretty is an important role. And that, to me, is simple.
Happy Mother's Day!


Lisa said...

Happy Mother's Day, Sandy!
You're on the right path, and I really appreciate your thoughtful post!

vonsachsen said...

A like this post very much, Sandy, and I agree with it - I would say totally if I could identify myslef with the being-a-mother part. I don´t have children myself, but I do see the same phenomenon that you describe, if I just look around, or even when I take a look at my own life. I often think to myself: my life is stressful enough, what would I do if I had children too?
I´ll see what your link has to say in a minute, but I agree that we have to slow down, enjoy what we have and not just wanting to achieve something all the time...(somebody please stop me, this is my favourite subject, nowadays I´m looking back a lot and wondering about old times without it possible to recreate them in the now? Or perhaps we shouldn´t want to REcreate them, but create our own happy present times?)OK, I´m shooting down myself now :) but as you see, you really got me going with your post...thanks


vonsachsen said...

Sorry, lost my focus for a while there...I haven´t had my morning cuppa yet:D
Happy mothers day to you and I´m sure you are a wonderful mom!! Also happy mothers day to all caring mothers, theirs is the most important "job", today they are raising and forming the society of tomorrow.
That vase is lovely:)

a friend to knit with said...

sandy. i love this post!
it is true. i can't stand the running either. cant. stand it!!! my mother always tells me it was easier when she raised me. there wasn't as much running. i try really hard to not over schedule my kids. i love to just be home with them. and enjoy every one of those moments. my husband couldn't support me more with this. he feels that those are the moments the kids will remember. so many of our friends over schedule their children. we just don't get it.

cheers to making life simple!
happy mother's day!

Anna said...

Happy Mothers day Sandy!

That's a very thoughtful post :-)

I always think that my most important job as a mother is to create happy memories...


Ms O said...

Happy Mother's Day, Sandy.

Lea x

Sandy said...

Eva, this is my favorite topic lately too. And not just as a parent, I think, but in general.
I think for some people, the running around may work. But definitely not for me.

I want to remember moments and savour them.

Kitchen Goddess said...

Happy Mothers Day Sandy. A very thoughtful read.

Philigry said...

i love this post and I really agree with you. We think s lot alike. My kids do nothave much compared to their friends. I said no to a play room packed full of toys, t.v's in their bedroom, entering them into every sport adn activity, and stuff like that. I think living simply is the key. That and, I remember playing outside with my sisters all day, even when they were like two and I was eight! I think it is a different world now.
I hope you had a great mother's day!

Kelly-Jane said...

Happy Mother's Day!

I sometimes wonder as well, I live my life stressed to the nines too much of the time, and I'm keen to not be this way. We will get there in the end, at least I like to think so :)


beki said...

I hear you, Sandy. I want this too. All this stress and running around is crazy.

Claudia said...

Hi Sandy,
Thank you for your nice comment on my "I freak out when I see that I have to make a quilt sandwich" quilt!!!! I think that I will work on my quilt tomorrow! So, how are you? Any good plan for the weekend?
Take care xox